Welcome to Astral Brews + PDF

Treasured associates, thank you for joining the AstralBrews family!

You may be experiencing discomfort as a result of the onboarding process, but please understand that nausea, sweating, and retrograde amnesia are all natural and temporary side effects of your new AstralBrews Cerebral Recipe Chip.

 

Please know that:

  1. All of AstralBrews' Stellar Recipes are already stored as implicit memories in your basal ganglia. No conscious thought is required; just let your hands do the work!
  2. Ingredients are automatically fed to your BrewFlux 90,000 from the Supply Room. If there is a supply machine error, please repair the corresponding machinery.
  3. There is no other reason to access other rooms of your Astral Brews location.
  4. If someone orders THE SPECIAL, just let our serving booth's automated systems do the work!
  5. Remember, our most valuable resource is you!
 

Thank you for your contributions to making AstralBrews the finest takeaway beverage service in Zone 45H2D!

 

The Team:

Writing: Chris Meabe
Editing: Christian Sorell
Layout: Jean Verne
Production and Development: Joel Hines


Two sided color trifold brochure. Includes PDF.


Price
$5.00
In stock!

Ships From

Shipping Information

Orders typically ship within 24-48 hours after being placed, business days only Monday - Friday. If you place an order on Friday, Saturday, or Sunday then it will not ship until the following business week. 

We use USPS, UPS and DHL. Rates are based on current service rates and are subject to change. For the majority of items we ship in deluxe padded bubble mailers with bags and boards for added protection or with cardboard book mailers. Larger orders will be finely packed as well. We care about the product getting to you safe and secure.  

 

SHIPPING OPTIONS:

US DOMESTIC ORDERS: 

FREE MEDIA MAIL SHIPPING WITHIN THE US FOR BOOK ONLY ORDERS $100 AND UP!

MEDIA MAIL

  • Inexpensive
  • Takes 6-10 days
  • Includes tracking
  • Only books are available for shipping Media Mail
  • NO INSURANCE- This means all sales are final. By choosing this option you understand the inherent risk with ordering

USPS Priority, UPS, and DHL

  • Takes 2-4 Business days, usually
  • Tracking included
  • All items in store are available to be shipped using these methods
  • Insured, lost or damaged items will be covered

INTERNATIONAL ORDERS:

Please note that ALL SALES ARE FINAL. Shipments are sent via DHL. Shipping does not include customs fees, which are subject to each countries' tax requirement. We want you to buy with confidence but please understand that once the items leave the USA we will not be responsible for lost or damaged items unless you contact us to get additional insurance if available. 

 

RETURNED PACKAGES

If your shipment is returned to us due to insufficient address or marked as undeliverable for any reason, we will need to collect another shipping fee in order to resend your item. 

If you request an item to be returned (excluding damaged or incorrect items) then you will be responsible for the return shipping fee. 

COMBINING ORDERS  

Only orders that contain items that are in stock at the time of ordering will be combined, when possible. 

WE DO NOT HOLD ITEMS

Essentially it is the same as above. We adore all of you and strive to give you the best possible customer experience possible but inventory tracking not only for us but for our vendors and partners makes this almost impossible to do now. 

PRE-ORDERED ITEMS

Pre-order dates are subject to change. We get as frustrated as you do when things come up but this happens from time to time. Sometimes circumstances beyond our control will create delays. We try to communicate via social media and our weekly newsletter to keep everyone as up to date as possible. 

All items in an order containing pre-orders will ship with the pre-order item once it is in stock. If you would like the other items earlier, please place a seperate order from the one containing the pre-order. 

We cannot combine pre-orders with existing orders nor combine new orders with existing pre-orders. 

Pre-orders will be exempt from any type of general sale.

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