crapland. squared edition + PDF

So stuff has changed. YET AGAIN

An aside on “squared being a different listing than splatter edition” 

So what’s new? Why is it a different listing. 

  • it’s completely new layout and design. MOST IMPORTANTLY IT’S SQUARE and  HAS BRAND NEW ART AND DESIGN WHICH THEY DIDN’T MAKE. 
  • BUT WHAT’S MORE, THERE IS MORE?!?$? 
    • There’s a new Spread with: THE OMEGACRAPTOR AND SOME DUDES WITH DOG HEADS?!??! 
    • Steve’s Place now has a name. 
    • The new design literally made them cry. 
  • It was a different project entirely that had its own budget, and is a new view into splatter edition. 
  • Also “why is it more than crapland splatter edition”. Well? they paid for layout and it’s REALLY GOOD. 

—— NOW ON WITH THE CRAP YOUVE GROWN TO EXPECT ——-

crapland. squared IS art.

crapland. squared IS for sale. (not to be confused with splatter edition)

crapland. squared IS a setting for TROIKA!... yeah you heard me

crapland. squared has EDITORS NOW. LIKE PEOPLE READ THIS AND SAID YEAH LETS RELEASE THIS. MRC IS ON THIS JARRETT CRADER AND JARED SINCLAIR. (honestly Jarrett convinced me to even do this, working with MRC is fantastic, DO IT)

BUT WAIT THERE IS ALSO SPECIAL peeps.. they gave some CRAPPYadvice christian kessler and david n wilkie

BUT REALLY ANXIETY WIZARD MADE IT BETTER OR MADE IT CRAPPY WHO EVER WILL KNOW BUT IT'S REALLY GOOD

crapland. squared Is more than crapland. squared was.

It is now a COMPLETE SETTING SO LOOK UNDER YOUR SEATS TO FIND IT. Its 60 PAGES AND INTERNALLY CONSISTENT. YEAH IT TAKES ITSELF SERIOUSLY AND ONLY HAS ONE (1) FART JOKE IN IT. 

To go into what crapland. was here's a paste in place, because hyperlinks are crappy.

crapland. WAS 6 crappy backgrounds for mundane mumblecore explorations into every day live. these people aren't real. they just are.

  • Shark-8: a shark, but a man, but also a shark. it's boring tho
  • Mel.: MEL FULL STOP. don't talk to mel unless u want the FULL STOP
  • Mok: a monkey. what more do you want from me. it's a monkey
  • Tela: toaster? computer? super computer.. maybe a super boring computer... leave me alone stop reading this crap
  • Riff: guitarist who is always late for his gig.. or something. does a good riff on his guitar tho.. maybe
  • Nope: they ain't telling you nothing.. nope. NOPE NOT A THING.

So WHAT IS crapland. Now?

  • Craptors have a full write up
  • D6 crappy adventures
    • Nope has a day out.. some errands to run, and has to get on the damned freeway.. an awful day indeed
    • Tela gets that dream bod they always wanted.. too bad it wants them back… a lot.. homicidally. 
    • Mok just wants to eat a banana
    • Shark-8 has a big surf competition coming up…. that bodes well.
    • Riff has a lot of gigs to attend to.. like blasting some sick riffs and delivering spicy fries.. how wrong could this battle of the bands go.. especially with some messed up orders?
    • Mel. Goes to the planetarium.. too bad for her the planets have shown up and want to abandon science altogether.. if they lose SCIENCE then they meltdown.. good luck when a gas giant is like “I DON’T BELIEVE IN NEWTON PHYSICS ANYMORE” FULL STOP
    • That’s all I’ve got for adventures.. stop asking.
  • D66 crappy items… they’re not good
  • D33 crap spells.. don’t cast them
  • D63 crappy reasons to get off the couch.. so don’t 
  • D63 crappy food in your crappy fridge.. it’s all terrible
  • D63 crappy shows on yer crappy tv… yeah turn it off.
  • D36 crappy effects from getting hit by a craptor knife… uh.. what does this even mean and what is a craptor
  • D33 crap effects from an interdimensional portal opening and letting forth another world that is decidedly less boring and much more cool where movies are decent and food tastes good
  • D63 crap jobs… you don’t need to get one
  • D33 crappy places to go… They wouldn’t go there either.

Oh and they've included versions a pristine version for you know.. for maximum un-gross feel.. and black and white.

legal crapland.

crapland. squared is an independent production by Orbital Intelligence and is not affiliated with the Melsonian Arts Council.”

---

Credits

  • Writing - Sean Richer
  • MORE WRITING - Anxiety Wizard... did you notice the new Omegacraptor?
  • Editing - Jarrett Crader and Jared Sinclair
  • Layout & Design - Anxiety Wizard
  • AAAART - Anxiety Wizard

64 page, full color (well mostly black and yellow) 8.5 x 8.5 inch, perfect-bound softcover book.


Price
$35.00
In stock!

Ships From

Shipping Information

Orders typically ship within 24-48 hours after being placed, business days only Monday - Friday. If you place an order on Friday, Saturday, or Sunday then it will not ship until the following business week. 

We use USPS, UPS and DHL. Rates are based on current service rates and are subject to change. For the majority of items we ship in deluxe padded bubble mailers with bags and boards for added protection or with cardboard book mailers. Larger orders will be finely packed as well. We care about the product getting to you safe and secure.  

 

SHIPPING OPTIONS:

US DOMESTIC ORDERS: 

FREE MEDIA MAIL SHIPPING WITHIN THE US FOR BOOK ONLY ORDERS $100 AND UP!

MEDIA MAIL

  • Inexpensive
  • Takes 6-10 days
  • Includes tracking
  • Only books are available for shipping Media Mail
  • NO INSURANCE- This means all sales are final. By choosing this option you understand the inherent risk with ordering

USPS Priority, UPS, and DHL

  • Takes 2-4 Business days, usually
  • Tracking included
  • All items in store are available to be shipped using these methods
  • Insured, lost or damaged items will be covered

INTERNATIONAL ORDERS:

Please note that ALL SALES ARE FINAL. Shipments are sent via DHL. Shipping does not include customs fees, which are subject to each countries' tax requirement. We want you to buy with confidence but please understand that once the items leave the USA we will not be responsible for lost or damaged items unless you contact us to get additional insurance if available. 

 

RETURNED PACKAGES

If your shipment is returned to us due to insufficient address or marked as undeliverable for any reason, we will need to collect another shipping fee in order to resend your item. 

If you request an item to be returned (excluding damaged or incorrect items) then you will be responsible for the return shipping fee. 

COMBINING ORDERS  

Only orders that contain items that are in stock at the time of ordering will be combined, when possible. 

WE DO NOT HOLD ITEMS

Essentially it is the same as above. We adore all of you and strive to give you the best possible customer experience possible but inventory tracking not only for us but for our vendors and partners makes this almost impossible to do now. 

PRE-ORDERED ITEMS

Pre-order dates are subject to change. We get as frustrated as you do when things come up but this happens from time to time. Sometimes circumstances beyond our control will create delays. We try to communicate via social media and our weekly newsletter to keep everyone as up to date as possible. 

All items in an order containing pre-orders will ship with the pre-order item once it is in stock. If you would like the other items earlier, please place a seperate order from the one containing the pre-order. 

We cannot combine pre-orders with existing orders nor combine new orders with existing pre-orders. 

Pre-orders will be exempt from any type of general sale.

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